bingewatches

Some of my favorite moments with Rockstar’s Red Dead Redemption 2 involved striking out on the dusty plains, with nothing but a friendly horse to carry me and a package full of goods. I’d listen to the gentle clip clop of my horse’s hooves and simply enjoy the atmosphere. Those quiet moments are lovely, but what if there was a much more dangerous alternative? What if every time I left Dutch’s camp, I was assailed by horse-shaped missiles and out-of-control carriages? This is a question few gamers are brave enough to ask, but it’s truly a sight to behold.

Streamer Blurbs created a mod that makes it so “all wagons and horses travel at super sonic speeds. It’s now a horror game.” Blurbs posted a supercut of some moments on his X account, and it’s truly terrifying. Trying to get into town? You’re gonna get wrecked. Out on the steppes? You’re not safe; a carriage might careen past you at any moment. Navigating a crowded urban center like St. Denis seems utterly impossible. It’s chaotic and ridiculous, in the style of comedian Tom Walker’s playthrough of Grand Theft Auto 4 with an ultra-speed mod enabled.

While Grand Theft Auto is potentially more dangerous, since the streets of Liberty City are narrow and crowded with cars, it looks like the austere historical setting of Red Dead Redemption can be just as risky. In a 12-minute video demonstrating the mod, Arthur is thrown into the sky, crushed beneath hooves, launched over the plains, and set on fire.

The entire video has the feel of the opening hours of a horse apocalypse movie. Passersby slam into pillars, bodies are hurled up into the air, and the citizens of the west are in a constant state of terror and alarm. Personally, I’d be pretty upset too if my horse had the power to fling me halfway across a whole city. There are also some wild physics mods that are triggered by a rowboat, and Blurbs is able to send his poor victims up in the air, flying in an infinite circle powered by a glitched rowboat.

This video has some prime antics, and while I treasure the serene moments of quiet I find in Red Dead, it’s pretty fun to watch unbridled chaos unfold in Blurbs’ playthrough. Rockstar has built a big, gorgeous world — just one that is perhaps best enjoyed at a stroll.